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"The things we want are really the times we share."

~ Rob Hueniken

From the monthly archives:

October 2009

The music we love

by Rob Hueniken on Thursday, October 29, 2009

mitch-miller

Rooted in the deepest parts of our brains is our love of music. Starting with our body’s natural rhythms and love of patterns, music winds its way through us, to us, and from us.

Everyone loves music — some type of music. And everyone makes music, whether it is a skilled performance on an instrument, singing a bit of a song, or tapping our feet.

Music is the natural joy language of all humans.

Mitch Miller,
loving the music

We each have a personal musical path through our lives, woven by deliberate forces such as radio and TV, shared experiences such as concerts and our friend’s iPod, and in the random, spontaneous music of our community.  We each experience a unique combination of musical influences, which are entwined with our moods, perception and life moments. So while many people “like” a particular song, the way it affects them and moves them is very personal.

As a child, much of my musical environment came from my parents. My father loved the clarinet solos of Benny Goodman and the trumpet work of Louis Armstrong. In a pre-rock era, these guys rocked, and their music crackled with creativity and energy.

the-music-we-love

My parents ran a small tourist resort, called Bala Cozy Cabins — 16 cottages on Moon River. Once a week we’d have a big bonfire for the guests in the late evening. When the fire settled down we’d roast hot dogs and marshmallows. As darkness fell I became more aware of the music piped down to the beach by my father. I would pause in my game of hide-and-seek, and hear songs by artists like Mitch Miller, who lead a choir in songs like “You are my sunshine” and “Heart of my heart“. Around the glow of the fire we shared the music.

As a young teen, I remember a Christmas in which my parents gave me a Donny Osmond album, when what I had in mind was Led Zeppelin. In that moment a realization came to me: that no matter how much I loved someone, I would have my own choice of music. My parents respected that, and I believe that everyone does.

Music can be communal — winding us together in shared vibrations, moments and even dreams. But always music is personal — a deep celebration of the world around us and within.

the-music-we-love-beatles

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Doing our part to help things work out

by Rob Hueniken on Wednesday, October 21, 2009

we-used-to-get-fedAt the core of our lives are two powerful traits: responsibility and compassion. While they sound like lofty ideals, responsibility and compassion are actually life’s calls to action, built into each of us. We know there are things we should do, and we know when we should be helpful and sensitive to others.  Knowing these things doesn’t make us responsible and compassionate — it is acting on these feelings by participating.

When we are young, most things are done for us. Mothers, fathers and caregivers watch over us, and try to give us what we need — both physically and emotionally.

As we get older, we learn skills and develop an understanding of the needs and emotions of both ourselves and others. Life prepares us, step by step, to move beyond receiving to giving and doing.

By the time we are teens we understand the power of action, and experience the sometimes unsettling shift to our own vital role in making things work out. We become aware that there are things to do, and feelings beyond our own that are worthy of care and consideration.

responsibility-and-compassion-require-action

While each of us needs times of rest and self-focus, being active and involved provides satisfaction and a joy of life that is felt on many levels.

As any elderly person with arthritis will tell you, there is a joy to being able to use our hands. Our bodies and minds like to do things, and there can be pleasure in simple chores — even washing the dishes or taking out the garbage. Human hands are wonderful creations, and using them to help ourselves and others is not just their essential purpose — it physically feels good!

Responsibility and compassion are essential for all successful relationships. We live in community, and though each of us needs our private time, being involved with others is a big part of our lives. When we make the shared parts of our lives better we all benefit. The key word here is “better”, and as anyone will tell you, “better” doesn’t happen on its own — making things better takes action; it takes effort.

There is a special, intense feeling of joy when we bring a smile to others. Some of the best smiles result from sharing a moment of appreciation, celebrating our shared efforts.  It is a smile that says “We are doing this together“.

When times are tough, knowing that someone cares brings strength and hope, but when someone takes action we see our situation improving, and that is a powerful inspiration for people.  Seeing progress — even a slow, small bit — can be like a train starting to move out of the station. It is exciting even if it is mundane, because action moves us forward.

Each of us has personal goals, and knows how good it feels to have something we care about work out. The same positive feelings are experienced for the goals we help others with. In fact, helping others can feel even better than helping yourself.

While ideas and knowledge are good things, it is the doing of things that makes life good.

There is a happy middle ground between exhaustion and idleness, and between servitude and insensitivity — it is being responsible and compassionate.

When we share in what needs to be done — helping each other, and being sensitive to each other’s feelings — we can get the right things done. We can help things work out.

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My father’s hammer

by Rob Hueniken on Monday, October 19, 2009

My-fathers-hammer

Stepping into my father’s workshop always takes me back in time. Not only are my parents collectors of memorabilia, but they continue to make good use of the things they already have. So when I look around my father’s garage I see tools that have existed since I was a boy, including a vice, a band saw, and various ancient screw drivers.

While my mother prepared our lunch, my father showed me his latest project – to add a second door to the front hallway, to keep the cold air out, but with a window to keep the light flowing in. Their front door already has a window in it, so a second door with a window would let my parents keep the natural light.

Being a resourceful person, my Dad took an unused door, removed a wooden panel, and was busy inserting a Plexiglas window into its heart. It was at this stage of the project that I arrived – to help my Dad nail in the Plexiglas.

Dad-using-hammer

As he prepared to starting hammering, a big smile came to my face – he was using the same finishing hammer that I had used as a boy. It was a bit more worn now, but it was still the same light-weight hammer I had used, before I was strong enough to use a regular hammer.  But in my Dad’s case, he knew that this job required a finishing hammer, so that is what he was using.

My role turned out to be supplying my father with one inch finishing nails, one at a time, while he hammered them carefully into place. He has a steady, practiced hand and not once did he bend a nail or dent the door with an errant hammer blow.

As I watched him working carefully and skillfully, I remembered my own hand on that hammer, and him helping me on projects. To be working together, with the simple job of handing him the next nail, was a sublime and satisfying joy – one that transcended the moment — connecting the two of us through years of building and sharing time together.

One hammer but many moments together – the joy of working side-by-side is not secondary, but the most important product of my father’s hammer.


Me-and-Dad

If you enjoyed this article, please read my poem about cleaning my son’s workshop area.


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Just a bit different – Cats and Dogs

by Rob Hueniken on Thursday, October 8, 2009

While some people cannot tell the difference between cats and dogs, there are actually ways to tell them apart.

cat-eaten-by-frog

Cats can be eaten by frogs.

Unlike the more manic and fast-moving dog, sleepy-headed cats can find themselves gnawed on by a stealthy frog — particularly the Wide-mouthed Couch frog.

Cat owners should be checking under their sofa seats to ensure that their favorite feline can catch a nap without fear of frog slobber.

[Advertising opportunity: Does your company sell a safe and reliable frog slobber blob dauber, or kitty-sized jaws of life? Global warming will double, yes double, the need for cat-extraction technology, as well as the need to provide homes and distribution channels for these lovable and misunderstood Wide-mouth Couch frogs. Contact us!]


dogs-are-bigger-than-cats

Dogs are bigger than cats.

While dogs are generally larger than cats, both dog and cat legs usually reach the ground — unlike those in this rare photo of the North American Ground-dwelling Dog.

Similar to camels, dogs can often go for long periods of time without a meal or a fatty snack — sometimes up to half an hour!

[Advertising opportunity: The market is growing for fatty snacks, preferably those suitable for the human/dog crossover market. Think "meaty-fruity-fibre". Doggy wagons (to put the dog into, not to be pulled by the dog) are also needed. No frail wagons, please! These dogs can dent pavement! Contact us!]


cats-are-taller

Cats can see farther than dogs.

Thanks to their higher-altitude perches on sofas, computer keyboards and otherwise clean kitchen counters, cats can see things farther away — at least in those moments between napping duties.

While parrots were the choice of most fictional pirates, the Japanese Standing Cat — seen checking the horizon for seafaring mice — narrowly missed its chance to stand tall and proud, like a fluffy gopher.

[Training opportunity: Japanese Standing Cats will soon be joining the opera tour circuit of Europe, and showing up in other fancy places, as the warm-up act and body-doubles for shy opera singers. Problem: none of the them (I mean "cats" here) seem to speak either English or European. This is a major opportunity to surge ahead in the exciting opera-focused entertainment arena. Contact us!]


dogs-travel-farther

Dogs travel further and faster.

Seen here in a high-speed travel holster, modern dogs use both their own legs as well as motion-assisting devices, including cars, circus ponies, and high speed mag-lev trains — basically they are happy being out and about, on their way to another snack or sniff-fest.

While few dogs are able to book their own travel, they are eager to be on their way, running to the door at the first sound of words resembling “walk”, “run” or “What is wrong with this dog?” This is unlike cats, which would wear a groove into the linoleum between the food dish, litter box and sofa if their paws weren’t so absolutely dainty.

[Advertising opportunity: We're looking for companies who can convince all women to carry dogs in the travel holsters we had designed for us by a previous Manufacturing opportunity. Help us!]


cats-are-cleanerPhoto by austinite

Cats are cleaner.

Thanks to advances in water-free tubs and tuna-flavored soaps, cats around the world are swirling their fur balls down the drain.

Unlike dogs, which are satisfied with sleeping on dirty welcome mats, cats know that a shiny coat, clean butt and “it’s all about me” attitude are vital social attributes for getting past the door and closer to the couch.

Plus, cats taste great, both during grooming and after! [At least to cats.]

[Research opportunity: The water-free tubs currently preferred by cats don't actually exist. We're looking for researchers to help us figure out what other things cats might pretend they own. Think about contacting us!]


dogs-have-a-lot-on-their-minds

Photo by FreeDigitalPhotos

Dogs have a lot on their minds.

As this photo shows, dogs are clearly brilliant thinkers. It can take a lot of planning, insight and careful strategy to be as close to food as possible without annoying your master.

While cats might become aloof and cranky when they don’t make the lecture circuit, dogs see this down-time as an opportunity to consider weighty issues, such as fat-to-fibre snack ratios, maximizing head pats, and the effects of air fresheners on both wet and dry noses.

[There are no research opportunities here -- the dogs are already handling all the deep thinking.]

Yes, cats and dogs are just a bit different !

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Thumbnail image for 10 ways to guarantee grumpiness

10 ways to guarantee grumpiness

October 6, 2009

Make a big deal of everything. Sure, we all have things we really care about, but what do we gain by insisting it’s our way or it’s no way? Stress. It’s amazing how the tension evaporates from our shoulders when someone says, “I’m fine with that”, or “That could work.” Have the wrong pet, or be the wrong owner. If you think your pet always looks like this, or perhaps that your pet would like to kill you, then it’s time to think outside the litter box. Your style might not work with this pet, and changing how you spend [...]

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Thumbnail image for A different perspective can help us reach our goal

A different perspective can help us reach our goal

October 5, 2009

As the stage designer for an 1100-seat auditorium I get to spend a lot of time up a ladder, reaching for things. Drapery, fishing line, cable ties and scissors are just some of the items I carry, tweak and twist while 10 feet off the ground.  I have a great respect for the stage, especially when I get to stand on it instead of looking down at it from a ladder. A recent stage design was based on the community theme of “Being Connected”, and used gears and steel trusses to give a mechanical representation of people being connected in [...]

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Thumbnail image for You will be eating again soon

You will be eating again soon

October 3, 2009

The finishing moment of many pleasant restaurant meals is having a fortune cookie. Dropped off with the cheque, fortune cookies are a final treat, and usually a source of optimistic wisdom. So it surprised me when I opened my fortune cookie to find this message: “You may be hungry soon: order a takeout now.” At first I thought that the cookie writer was expanding upon an old joke about Chinese food burning off quickly, but then I read it again. Yes, I would be hungry soon — not “may be hungry soon”. I would want something to eat, and I [...]

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